Destiny Of Souls

Posted by admin_akashic on Aug 16th, 2021 in Stories

Reuniting with Souls Who Have Hurt Us

Now that we have an idea of the roles different soulmates can play in our lives, I want to discuss a specific aspect of these associations that is of interest to people. I am often asked what it is like to see someone in our soul group right after a life where they have hurt us in some way. The philosopher Heidegger said, “No one else can love for you or feel your pain.” This statement may be true on Earth, but not in the spirit world. Souls are capable of getting into the minds of their friends and feeling just what they feel. They do this for reasons of empathy, a desire for understanding and to evaluate the disruptive behavior of each other in the last life.

In case 47, I have chosen a man who had a rough start in his last life with an abusive, tyrannical father who was never satisfied with anything he did. For simplification, I will use the Earth names of these players with my subject being Ray and his father as Carl. Ray was a troubled boy who grew up lacking self- worth and his entire adult life was spent trying to conquer these negative feelings. Ray hid his sensitivity from others by building protective walls around himself. What happened when father and son met again in the spirit world is the substance of this case.

We are going to sit in on what Ray called “a motivational critiquing session” with Carl. The opening scene begins innocently enough with the usual greetings extended to an arriving soul by members of a cluster group. It might be helpful to refer back to figure 3 on page 143 where I have diagrammed the soul group as they would appear on the upper half of a clock. I employ my “clock technique” with incoming souls to help me determine soul position as my hypnosis subjects identify members of their cluster group.

Case 47

Dr. N: As you draw closer to these souls, how are they arranged in front of you?

S: Mmm . . . sort of a half circle with me coming into the middle.

Dr. N: I want you to imagine that their positions conform to the face of a clock. You are in the center, where the hands of the clock are located. The person directly in front of you would be at 12 o’clock. The one on your left is at 9 o’clock and the one on your right at 3 o’clock. Do you understand?

S: Yes, but my guide Ix-Ax is behind me right now.

Dr. N: That’s usual at this first reunion, Ray. We will consider him to be between 7 and 5 o’clock. Now tell me, from what direction on the face of our clock does the first person come forward to greet you?

S: To my far left—at 9 o’clock.

Note: The first person to come forward and greet us after a life is always a soul of significance.

Dr. N: That’s fine. Does this soul appear as a male or female to you, or is the soul genderless?

S: (tenderly) It’s my wife, Marian.

Dr. N: And what does she do right now?

S: Cups my face in her hands . . . she gives me a soft, gentle kiss and then hugs my head.

Each spirit has their own style of greeting for the incoming soul. After Marian, Ray’s grandmother wraps her energy completely around him lovingly, as a cloak. Then, his daughter Ann comes forward. Part of her energy is still on Earth because her current incarnation is not yet complete. Despite this reduction in energy mass, Ann clasps Ray in an exuberant rocking motion while laughing at his unsettled demeanor.

As we progressed around the clock, I noticed that my subject grew more uneasy. I suspected an important member of the group was not yet in Ray’s line of sight. As we neared the end of the circle of souls, the mood began to change when Ray encountered what I call “the hunkering-down syndrome,” which is caused by one soul hiding behind another. Sometimes the act is playful, rather like hide-and-seek, but not in this case.

Dr. N: Is that everybody?

S: (twisting uncomfortably in my office chair) No . . . I see a shadow behind my Aunt Bess.

Dr. N: (after calming and reassurance) Ray, tell me exactly what happens next.

S: I see a flash of light now. (with recognition) Oh . . . it’s my father . . . Carl. He is hiding behind the rest. He wants to be last. He is avoiding me. He is embarrassed at the lightness of the moment—all the hugging, laughing and excitement going on. My father doesn’t feel like participating in this right now with me. (darkly) Neither do I.

Note: A little further on in the session I make the transition back to the soul who was Carl.

Dr. N: I want you to move forward to the time when you talk to Carl. Try to give me the details of just how your conversation with him unfolds.

S: We soon get to this . . . the critiquing of what took place and why . . . talking about our attitudes and judgments. Marian and Ann are there, and Carl is still chagrined. He starts by saying, “I was too severe with you as your father. I know what we planned got out of hand. That life—it just got away from me . . .”

Dr. N: What does this admission mean to you, Ray?

S: (with a sense of revelation) Carl’s soul is not like the alcoholic, abusive man who was my father . . . oh, I see some similarities . . . but his innate goodness was shut down. He was not able to control the obsessions of this body.

Dr. N: Forgive me, Ray, but aren’t you making excuses for his performance?

I mean, Carl had lessons to learn too, didn’t he?

S: Okay, he volunteered to join with a body prone to emotional outbursts. Besides the plan of making things deliberately hard for me, he wanted to see if he could better moderate a body prone to violence. Carl’s previous life was one of excesses. He admits this last life we had together did not work out well. Carl did not do the right thing by me or himself.

Dr. N: (pressing) You still don’t think Carl is excusing what he did to you as your father because of his body type?

S: No, you can’t get away with that here. Carl is explaining that he failed me in many ways this time around, but he learned from the life and he asks me if I did too. (pause)

Dr. N: Please continue with this, Ray.

S: (a deep sigh) I can see all his anger is gone and this is strange to me now because I haven’t yet gotten used to his real self . . . but it won’t take long.

Dr. N: As you consider all this, Ray, what negative inclinations does the soul of Carl have which carry into his incarnations?

S: He knows it is the desire to control events and people around him. His past life as my father fed into those tendencies. Both of us have trouble in life with confrontation. This is why we work so well with Ann and Marian. They seem to diffuse life’s frustrations so much easier than we do.

Dr. N: Let’s return to the circumstances which led to your need to be under the control of a stern father who was supposed to make things deliberately hard. Even if Carl had not gone overboard in his assignment, I don’t understand why you volunteered to be his son.

S: (laughs) For that you would have to know our guide, Ix-Ax. He uses humor rather than being overly preachy. He doesn’t push us hard as an authority figure because Carl and I react badly to a firm hand. Ix-Ax nudges us while letting us believe all the ideas we get come from our own perceptions. (pauses) Ix-Ax allows me to think I am getting away with something and then he tweaks my conscience. He is a coach, not a director.

Dr. N: Well, I’m glad to get that information about Ix-Ax, but how does all this relate to you and Carl and this past life of a damaged relationship between you?

S: (patiently) In my life before the last one with Carl I was an orphan and got into some bad habits. I lost my real identity in that body. It was a wake-up call.

Dr. N: In what way?

S: I had no directional support as a kid. My mother had died. Being alone as a kid can make or break you. The trouble was . . . as I grew stronger and more self-reliant, I had little concern for others. I created a life of taking and giving back little. I felt people owed me.

Dr. N: Look, Ray, do you have to go to such extremes? How about having a loving father in the life you planned with Carl to compensate for the one before as an orphan?

S: (shrugs) Too easy. After my life as an orphan, Ix-Ax asked me, “I suppose now you are ready for a life of being pampered by indulgent parents?” I said to him, “Say, that doesn’t sound bad at all.” Then he added, “Shall we also arrange for you to be an only child of wealthy parents?” We had some fun with this scenario for a while with Carl entering into the discussion with a few quips about wanting plenty of money as my rich father in order to play the horses. He loves horses.

Dr. N: So how did you and Carl finally come around to making the decision to have a stressful life together?

S: Ix-Ax knows us so well. I am too far along for a soft-soap approach to life.

In the end we asked him for assignments together in a difficult environment.

Dr. N: Didn’t things go from bad to worse for you as far as loneliness and alienation in your last two lives? I’m wondering if you and Carl learned anything from having such a poor relationship as father and son.

S: (pause, while rubbing his hands together in thought) Yes and no. It’s true I let my alienation in both these past lives serve as an excuse for a lack of real progress but at least I had a father in my last life who didn’t leave. I did better with Carl’s abuse than total abandonment in my life before Carl, when I was an orphan.

Dr. N: That’s not much of an endorsement. Was the soul of Carl your father in your life as an orphan?

S: No.

Dr. N: What was your primary lesson in the last two lives?

S: To keep my identity, no matter what the adversity. This will make me a stronger soul.

Dr. N: I’m sure it will, Ray. But I should think you might consider slowing down now and then and take easier lives as a change of pace. Would it be so bad to catch your breath and build a stronger foundation for identity retention in future bodies?

S: (clearly upset with this suggestion) No! I told you I can do this and Ix-Ax knows it, too. My strength is perseverance in fighting adversity. My life with Carl as my father was a recovery test from the previous life as an orphan and it was not a failure for me. (forcefully) I learned plenty for the next life and I tell Carl this to make him feel better.

Dr. N: How do the two of you bring all this to some sort of resolution in the spirit world?

S: (in a softer, more contemplative tone) When we are alone we agree to exchange the energy of our thoughts and all the memories of that life together.

Dr. N: Is this the full mind exchange I have heard about?

S: Yes, every particle of my identity as Carl’s son in that life is transferred to Carl while he projects all his memories as my father to me. It’s very subjective—and that’s good. In my group we call this passing the cup of sorrows.

Dr. N: And is each perspective totally honest?

S: There can be no deception here.

Dr. N: Does this exchange last long?

S: No, the transfer is brief but complete. Then we know all the trials and burdens, pain and anger—the drives—from the other’s perspective because it is like actually being inside their old body. We become the other person.

Dr. N: Does this mind exchange bring forgiveness?

S: It is so much more than that. It is an indescribable melding of two minds.

We can both experience the circumstances which led the other to make certain choices. I feel Carl’s lack of fulfillment and he feels mine. Once the exchange is made, it cuts so deep forgiveness toward another isn’t necessary. You forgive yourself and then we heal each other.

Understanding is absolute. We will try again in a different life until we get it right.

After some initial awkwardness in the spirit world following their last lives together, Ray and Carl were relaxed and happy once again in their soul group. This does not mean that Carl’s conduct was quickly exonerated in the spirit world. During his life review and evaluation, before he saw Ray, Carl was keenly aware of the excessive pain and hurt he had wrought upon Ray. There are two forces at work here. The first is the potential subversion of the soul’s full character by the biophysical attributes of a host body, along with the effects of specific environmental influences. The second factor is the role they were each assigned to play out in the stream of karmic causation.

Each life is a piece of fabric which makes up the whole tapestry of our existence. If a family member or friend is harsh and uncompromising, or perhaps weak and emotionally distant toward us in life, we are only seeing an external portion of the entire true character of that soul. Role assignments in life all have purpose. If you grew up with a particularly difficult parent, as Ray did with Carl, ask yourself this question: What did I learn at the hands of this person that has given me wisdom I would not possess if he or she had never been in my life?

Ray has had his difficulties in his current life with chemical dependency and obsessive behavior. Yet, at age 45, he is drawing on his inner resources and turning things around. From what Ray has told me, getting in touch with his true soul identity in our session together has been very helpful. The soul of Carl is now my client’s older brother, who was not easy on Ray when they were growing up. Many of the same relationship patterns are being played out today as in the past. Even so, these two souls have been far more engaged with each other as brothers than they were as father and son.

By not burying unpleasant memories in this life, Ray’s soul lives in a mentally healthier body. This time around the soul of Ann, a principal player, is Ray’s mother rather than a daughter. She provides a different generational dimension to his current life. Gershen Kaufman has written that “shame is a kind of soul murder.” One of Ray’s issues is the handling of shame. Shame brings a numbness to our minds because it ushers in feelings of nonacceptance, of being no good and having no validity. It may be so overpowering as to preclude any soul progress in a human mind that has shut down. However, Ray is an unusually determined soul who, as we have seen, won’t give up these hard lives for an occasional rest. He grows stronger by building on each hard life.

Case 47 illustrates that there are souls who continually ask for body types that challenge their weakness of soul character. Both Ray and Carl are souls who easily fall into addictive habits with certain types of body chemistry. Why do they continue to ask for these bodies? They do it for practice. Any obsessive mood-altering behavior is a fix and Ray is determined to conquer this before moving on. I know this soul is making progress. After two failed marriages, Ray told me he has met the woman of his dreams, but he had to be clean of drugs and alcohol to appreciate her. We learned his wife-to-be is the soul of Marian.

A final word about the hunkering-down syndrome, where a returning soul might not initially see a group member clearly. When this happens to someone sitting in my office it may be that the soul who is hiding from a client’s conscious awareness is going to have a profound future impact. I recall a young widow who came to see me while still grieving over the recent loss of her husband. We had reviewed all the members of her soul group, including the soul of her departed husband. He embraced her in an emotional scene where he told her to stay strong and everything would turn out all right. Then she said, “Ah, there is one more. A dark figure, bending down behind the others. Oh—it’s the soul of my future husband. I’m sure of this—but we haven’t met yet in this life. I’m not supposed to know who he is right now because it would spoil the spontaneity of our meeting.”