But even the most sensible Christians did not yet know the fate that awaited them, and they watched all the preparations in surprise. Some who knew me by sight came innocently up to me in the middle of all the rush to ask how long they would remain under arrest and when the trial would begin. They considered they had many important matters to arrange and see to in their work. I tried in vain to explain to them that the verdict had already been pronounced and that it would be best if they prepared themselves to die courageously in different ways and in honor of Christ, to make a memorable spectacle for the Senate and the people of Rome. But they just shook their heads and did not believe me.
“You’re just trying to frighten us for fun,” they said. “Such things cannot happen in Rome.”
They did not even believe me when they had to strip and the tailors and shoemakers hurriedly began to sew them into animal skins. On the contrary, some of them laughed and gave advice to the sewers. Young boys and girls growled and pretended to claw at each other after being dressed in a panther skin or a wolfskin. So great is human vanity, that they even competed for the most beautiful pelts when they saw that they were going to be forced to wear them. They did not realize why, although they could hear the continuous howling of my harrier hounds in the cellars.
When the theater people selfishly began to select the most beautiful and attractive people for their own purposes, I thought I had better look after my own interests and had the thirty most beautiful women selected for me for the Dirce number. While the Danaides and their Egyptian bridegrooms were being dressed in their costumes, I managed to collect what I thought was a satisfactory supply of women ranging from sixteen to twenty-five years of age, and had them taken to one side, so that no dishonest theater people could come and snatch them from me.
I think the Christians first realized the truth when the first rays of sunlight began to fall across the sand and the soldiers began to crucify the worst criminals. I had been forced to use the beams and planks that had been brought for the purpose to strengthen the walls of the stables, but even so it was no use putting up crosses too near each other on the sand, for they would only have obstructed both the view and the displays.
Tigellinus had to hurry off to the Senate. Hastily, I decided that only fourteen crosses, one for each sector of the city, should be raised in the arena. On each side of the entrances there would be space for more crosses, but beyond that they would have to be content with nailing as many as there was room for to the wooden fencing which ran around the race-course.
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To make more room, Tigellinus had sent a thousand men and a thousand women under guard to Agrippina’s gardens, where Nero was to invite the people to a meal in the evening. But the people would have to be offered something during the show too, for the Vatican circus is so far from the city itself that one could not expect the people to go home for their midday meal. Thanks to the excellent organization in the Imperial kitchens, innumerable food hampers now began to arrive as quickly as the men could carry them, one basket per ten spectators, special baskets with wine and roast chicken for the senators, and two thousand baskets for the Noble Order of Knights.
I thought that it was unnecessary to have so many Christians nailed to the fencing around the arena, using so many expensive nails. In addition I was afraid that the cries from the crucified would disturb the displays, although at first, perhaps from nothing but surprise, they were astonishingly quiet. I do not say this from envy. It becomes monotonous, watching the crucified writhing about when there are so many of them. So I was not in the least afraid that the crowd’s attention would be distracted from my animals to the advantage of Tigellinus’ innovation.
But when a thousand people scream with pain, it is a sound which drowns the best bear growls and even the roaring of lions, not to mention the heralds’ explanations of the mimes, I thought I acted correctly when I assembled some of the leading Christians and sent them around to ask the crucified people to be quieter during the show, or at most cry out in the name of Christ so that the people would know for what they were being punished.
The Christian teachers, several of whom were already sewn into animal skins, understood their task exactly. They spoke to the groaning people and assured them that theirs was the greatest honor, for they were being allowed to die on the cross as Jesus of Nazareth had done. Their trials were to be short compared with the eternal salvation which awaited them in the kingdom of Christ. That very evening they would be in paradise.
The teachers spoke so convincingly that I had to smile. But when with even greater fervor they began to tell the crucified people that this day was the day of greatest joy, in which the innocent were to be allowed to suffer to the glory of Christ and as his witnesses ascend to heaven, I began to bite my lips.
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